The Truth About Tigers

If I ever die, which, naturally,
I assume will happen someday,
and if reincarnation turns out to be true,
should fate return me to life,
as a guinea pig, of all things,
I’d cross my tiny paws for a home in Switzerland,
where laws ensure we’re never alone,
forbidding the solitary keeping
of our highly social kind.

But imagine my geographical wish granted,
only to find myself reborn in a dangerous den of outlaws,
a family daring enough to defy the Federal Assembly,
owning just one guinea pig – me.
Oh, what a peculiar bit of irony that would be.

Yet, this curious twist of fate
might not be so dire after all…

In such a rogue household,
where the Guinea Pig Companionship Decree
(or whatever name the Parliament has given this law)
is blatantly disregarded,
each sunrise would surely herald an adventure,
a tiny, whiskered rollercoaster of illegal thrills.

In our small, rebellious home,
every night would unfold as a daring escapade,
eluding the Rodent Camaraderie Police,
thriving in our adorable defiance.
Just a reincarnated guinea pig outcast,
embracing a brand-new life
with my merry band of European renegades
on the shadowy edge of Swiss society.

Or perhaps I’d just find myself lonely,
Sleeping safely in my solitary cage
upon a bed of fragrant cedar,
watching as my novelty slowly fades,
and the children’s fleeting affections
drift towards newer, shinier distractions.
But I’m hoping for the former,
If I ever die, which, naturally,
I assume will happen someday,
And reincarnation turns out to be true.